Although the consequences of a divorce can be both positive and negative, it can be a very turbulent time for a family. With the legalities of separation and conflicting emotions of the two people involved, the children are often left on the sidelines. This begs the question – Can a family ever be whole after the divorce?
Does divorce destroy family life?
When a marriage ends, it can have a profound effect on the family life. Regardless of the length of your marriage or the age of your children, you would have to grapple with the reality that the envisioned family life will be affected. If you have a long-term marriage where the family patterns and the connections have been established, the problems can become all the more pronounced. It is especially hard for the children, as they see their parents as the first example of people working together to build a world. It can have a drastic effect on how they perceive the world. With adult children, renegotiating your relationship as a family becomes even more difficult as there are lesser daily interactions.
What are the effects of divorce on families?
Here is how divorce affects the major relationships in families –
Parent-Child Relationship: The immediate effect of divorce can be observed in the decline of the parent-child relationship. Divorce affects the children’s ability to trust people, and some children might also feel a lack of support.
Mother-Child Relationship: Even when the mothers have the best intentions in mind, their relationship with their children can decline after divorce. It has been found that in some cases children are not able to get the emotional support they require. They might also have communication problems with the mothers.
Father-Child Relationship: In many cases, noncustodial divorced fathers are not able to maintain a consistent relationship with their children. The children are not able to receive the support they require from their father, which can cause the relationship to sour.
Sibling Relationships: It has been observed that children from divorced families often tend to have a hostile relationship with their siblings too.
Relationship with Grandparents: Divorce also affects the relationship of the child with grandparents and the extended family. If the contact with the divorced father diminishes, the contact with the paternal grandparents can also diminish with time.
What are the negative effects of divorce?
Divorce rates have increased significantly in recent years. According to a 2014 CDC report, around 50 percent of all marriages in the United States end in divorce. With so many families affected by divorce every year, it has become important to determine the negative effects of divorce on children. Many studies have shown that the children often have to endure both physical and emotional trauma as their parents try to navigate through their own conflicts. The children from divorced families find it difficult to trust people and form close relationships.
They might also have decreased physical health in some cases. Here are some common problems that affect children of divorce –
1) Physical ailments: Headaches, asthma, speech impediments, heart problems, strokes, and cancer.
2) Psychological problems: Some teens in blended or single-parent families might also require psychological help.
3) Higher chances of clinical depression, suicidal thoughts
4) Attachment issues
5) Lower academic performance
7) Sexual promiscuity
What are the effects of divorce on society?
The effects of divorce on society can be understood from three different perspectives –
Divorce and its effect on social life: The social consequences of divorce are not only felt by the children but also by the adults. Many couples undergoing a divorce might find that their social circle becomes narrow, and they also end up losing their married friends. In some cases, their relationship with extended family members is also affected. Children, of course, have to suffer a lot as there are displaced from their family setting. All of this can cause the adults to feel isolated, which can lead to depression.
Divorce and its effect on employment: The negative effects of divorce often extend to the workplace too. Certain studies have shown that employees undergoing a divorce often show a higher degree of absenteeism, stress, anxiety, and other issues. This is because the high-stress situation of divorce leads to a decrease in the productivity and energy levels of the people.
Divorce and its effect on finances: Divorce can also affect your finances to a great degree. Many couples have to adjust to having a single-income household. Certain studies have also shown that divorce breeds poverty. In many cases, mothers have to provide for the kids by working multiple jobs.
What are the reasons why the Catholic Church is against divorce?
It is a fact that divorce is not recognized by the Roman Catholic Church. According to the Catholic Church, the only times a marriage can end is when one of the partners dies, or when there are legitimate grounds for divorce. In all other cases, even when a couple files for a civil divorce, the marriage will continue to be recognized by the church. Here are the reasons why the church is against divorce and remarriage –
According to Like 16:18 of the Bible, any person who divorces his wife to marry another will be found guilty of committing adultery. Similarly, if one marries a divorced woman, he will also be found guilty of adultery.
According to Matthew 5:31-32 of the Bible, any man who divorces his wife on grounds other than unchastity would make her guilty of adultery.
Catechism considers divorce to be against the natural law of the world. It further states that it harms the covenant of salvation, and sacramental marriage is an important part of that. It also considers divorce to be immoral, and it says that it brings disorder into the society and the family.
For these reasons and more, people who are part of the Roman Catholic Church often try to avoid divorce at all costs. However, if they believe that the issues cannot be resolved, they can go ahead with the divorce.
Is divorce a sin?
There can be many reasons behind a divorce like abuse, adultery, financial mismanagement, or falling out of love. However, the question that plagues many is this – Is divorce a sin? From many interpretations of the Bible, it can be safely said that divorce is not something that God wants. However, the claim about it being a sin requires some further examination. The truth is that the scripture, in many instances, shows how God allows for divorce in certain cases. It has been stated in both the Old Testament and the New Testament that divorce can be granted for –
- Sexual immorality
- Physical Abuse
- Emotional Abuse
10 top reasons for divorce 2020 and beyond
Marriage can be quite beautiful, however, it can be difficult to maintain its sanctity if both sides are not willing to work on it. Here are some of the most common reasons for divorce –
Falling out of love: Some couples tend to drift apart over time, to the point when there is no love left in the marriage.
Lack of support: Some couples end up divorcing because of a lack of emotional support through the changes in life.
Disagreement: Oftentimes, the values of people can change with time. Couples end up divorcing if they are not able to agree on important things
Behavioral changes: People also file for divorce if they feel that their partner’s behavior towards them is disrespectful or demeaning.
Emotional disconnection: Sometimes, couples develop differences due to a lack of emotional connection in the marriage.
Unbalanced roles: If the roles in housework are unbalanced, it can also lead to a fallout.
Problems with family members
FAQ relating to effect of divorce on the family
What happens to a family after divorce?
When a couple goes through a divorce, it can be an extremely stressful situation for the whole family. It is not only the immediate family that gets affected but the extended family too. It can also change the family dynamics to a great degree. However, with loving relationships and healthy communication, families can learn to adjust better while navigating this situation.
How harmful is divorce?
The impact of a divorce can be far-reaching, as it not only affects the couple’s family life but also their social life. People undergoing a divorce might have to battle with emotional issues, and changed economic status, and they often suffer from anxiety and depression too. If the couple has any children, they end up going through a lot too. So it is safe to say that a divorce can be very harmful.
Is it better for parents to divorce or stay together?
Divorce should not be taken lightly, as it can be a painful and difficult process. However, it is not necessarily a sentence for doom. In many cases, divorce can rescue people from situations that can be much more damaging in the long run. As for the question about which is better – staying together or parting ways – it can be difficult to give one answer. It largely depends on the type of circumstances the two people in the marriage are. If the situation is beyond repair, it is always better to part ways.
Can divorce be positive for families?
There can be some positive effects of divorce on family and children too, especially if their parents were in a disrespectful and volatile relationship. If after the divorce, the co-parenting is handled sensibly, it can have the following positive effects –
- The parent who has been less involved historically might step up their involvement with the kid.
- The children will be able to learn useful skills for conflict resolution.
- Children might get more one-on-one time with their parents.
- Both the parents get a greater opportunity to get involved in their children’s life.
At what age does divorce affect a child?
According to some experts, a child gets affected by divorce to a greater degree if they have not reached adulthood. Once the child attains the age of 3, the potential for emotional trauma increases. It can then peak when they are 11 years of age.
What do you lose in a divorce?
The losses in the process of a divorce can be many. The major loss for parents is lesser time with children. Besides this, you also end up losing shared traditions, history, and memories, among other things. Some might suffer from financial losses while others’ social life gets affected. At the end of it all, the biggest loss is the realization that your future will not be what you hoped it would be.